|
|
halloween
this couple was getting ready to go to a Halloween party
but the wife had a terrible headache. She told her husband
to go anyway. After a short argument he agreed, and she took
some aspirin and went ... |
0 |
18 |
3 |
3.92 |
9/7/2010 3:31 am |
|
|
Husband & wife !
A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror.
She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband,
'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really
need you to pay me a ... |
0 |
27 |
8 |
1.16 |
9/5/2010 7:29 am |
|
|
Check for Alzheimer's !
The following was developed as a mental age assessment
by the School of Psychiatry at Harvard University.
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without
making a mistake. ... |
0 |
29 |
12 |
0.50 |
9/3/2010 6:12 am |
|
|
Happy woman !
A woman in her fifties is at home, naked, happily jumping
on her bed and squealing with delight.
Her husband watches her for a while and asks, "Do you
have any idea how ridiculous you ... |
0 |
44 |
13 |
1.97 |
9/2/2010 2:09 pm |
|
|
Quickie in the Bushes !
There are two statues in a park; One of a nude man and one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a path way for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky ... |
0 |
26 |
9 |
0.86 |
9/2/2010 1:54 pm |
|
|
the earring
Morris is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker,
Joe, is wearing an earring. This man knows his co-worker
to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about
his sudden change in ... |
0 |
21 |
1 |
3.70 |
9/2/2010 8:56 am |
|
|
in the beginning....
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God.
"Lord, I have a problem!"
"Whats the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you created me and provided this beautiful
garden ... |
1 |
22 |
5 |
2.16 |
9/1/2010 2:25 am |
|
|
Paper Bag
Two guys were in a bar arguing whos wife was the ugliest.
 This went on for some time, until finally they told each
other to prove it./:>
So they leave the bar and go to one of ... |
4 |
71 |
12 |
1.56 |
8/28/2010 12:42 am |
|
|
The $2.99 Special !
We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the 'seniors'
special' was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast
for $2.99.
'Sounds good, ' my wife said. 'But I don't
want the eggs.' ...
|
0 |
53 |
8 |
2.78 |
8/25/2010 10:02 am |
|
|
Senior Love !
An elderly senior couple was invited to an old friend's
home for dinner one evening. She was impressed by the way
her lady friend preceded every request to her husband with
endearing terms such ... |
0 |
41 |
3 |
2.45 |
8/25/2010 9:49 am |
|
|
big vacation
There was a couple who were big over-spenders. They always
dreamed to spend holidays in Hawaii, but were never able
to save any money to do so. One day they came up with an idea--each
time they had ... |
1 |
39 |
5 |
1.51 |
8/24/2010 2:49 pm |
|
|
the nympho
A guy sees his buddy in a bar and says, "You're
not going to believe this, but I've got a wild nymphomaniac
in my car out in the parking lot. She's wearing me out!
Can you go out to the car and keep ... |
1 |
55 |
6 |
3.08 |
8/24/2010 1:50 pm |
|
|
out to lunch
A man and a beautiful woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.
Their waitress (taking another order at a table a few paces away)
suddenly noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair ... |
1 |
32 |
4 |
1.30 |
8/24/2010 1:23 pm |
|
|
gun shopping
A woman walks into a sporting-goods store and asks the salesman
if he could help her pick out a rifle. Its for my husband, she
explains.
Did he tell you what caliber to get? asks the ... |
1 |
33 |
3 |
1.47 |
8/24/2010 1:17 pm |
CTska, 26 M
8/23/2010 5:20 am
4
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
So
A guy says to his wife who happens to be wearing a lemon between
her legs (he is wearing a potato), if your going as a sour
puss, i'm going as a dick potato. ba ... |
2 |
39 |
6 |
0.23 |
8/23/2010 5:20 am |
|
|
The genie !
Husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf.....
Unfortunately, the wife promptly whacked her first shot
right through the window of the biggest house adjacent
to the course. ... |
9 |
107 |
32 |
2.02 |
8/16/2010 9:18 am |
|
|
ON THIS GOAT IN POLITICS: PART ONE
ANIMAL ACTIVISTS SAY FREE THE WHALES...CALL TO SHUT DOWN PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING?
As you can tell from my last few posts my brain has gone to
a happier place. I don't want to give them ya-hoos credit
for an intervention. It's more because I am having
the ... |
4 |
28 |
7 |
3.30 |
8/2/2010 7:52 pm |
|
|
big johnnie
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's
to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!"
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of
the night! He went home and ... |
3 |
90 |
11 |
4.48 |
7/31/2010 8:08 pm |
|
|
a womans touch
A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about
psychology when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey,
I bet you can't tell me something that will make me happy
and sad at the same ... |
3 |
99 |
13 |
4.15 |
7/31/2010 7:35 pm |
|
|
the hen pecked hillbilly
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully.
From morning till night (and sometimes later), she was always
complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when
he ... |
2 |
74 |
6 |
3.93 |
7/31/2010 7:26 pm |
|
|
once again....communication is key...
A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending
divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your
divorce?"
She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home
in the middle of the ... |
2 |
55 |
5 |
3.80 |
7/31/2010 7:12 pm |
|
|
the chairman of the board
Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's
wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary
sitting in his lap.
Without hesitating, he dictated, ... |
3 |
68 |
8 |
3.48 |
7/31/2010 7:01 pm |
|
|
the story of john smith...
A woman dies, and when she gets to heaven she asks Saint Peter,
"Would it be possible for me to get together with my
dear departed husband? He died many years ago." Saint
Peter asks, "What's his ... |
2 |
62 |
10 |
3.78 |
7/31/2010 6:36 pm |
|
|
30 years of marriage
On their wedding night, the young bride approached her
new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking
encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily
agreed.
This ... |
1 |
59 |
7 |
3.04 |
7/31/2010 6:27 pm |
|
|
final answer
A man and his wife went to bed one night and the man was getting
very frisky and asked his wife if she was in the mood. His
wife answered, "Not tonight dear I have a headache."
The man ... |
1 |
51 |
7 |
2.28 |
7/31/2010 6:16 pm |
|
|
a quote from oscar wilde
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
Oscar ... |
1 |
29 |
6 |
2.51 |
7/31/2010 5:44 pm |
|
|
about men
Men are like fine wine: They all start out as grapes, and
it is your job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until
they mature into something you'd want to have with
dinner.
Men are ... |
1 |
39 |
6 |
2.80 |
7/31/2010 5:43 pm |
|
|
needy?
Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he/she
isn't there the first time you need him, chances are
you won't be needing him ... |
1 |
21 |
5 |
2.16 |
7/31/2010 5:37 pm |
|
|
Aging !
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so
I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club
and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class
for seniors. I bent, twisted, ... |
5 |
65 |
13 |
2.81 |
7/26/2010 8:30 am |
|
|
You know you're a okie when....
1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same
tree. 2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with
a fly swatter. 3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. 4. ... |
1 |
38 |
7 |
1.51 |
7/26/2010 8:13 am |
|
|
Lucky Guy
Two buddies are sitting at the bar in a singles' club
and talking about another guy at the other end of the bar.
"I don't get it, " complained the first
guy: "He's not good-looking, he has ... |
1 |
68 |
6 |
0.80 |
7/25/2010 6:06 pm |
|
|
Single Women VS Married Women
Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?
A. Because single women come home, take a look at what's
in the fridge and go to bed. When married women come home,
they check out what's ... |
1 |
67 |
7 |
1.77 |
7/25/2010 6:04 pm |
|
|
a day at dollar general
THE OTHER DAY MY GIRL, CLOTERRA, CALLED ME AND ASK ME TO COME
TO HER JOB. SO I WENT TO DOLLAR GENERAL WHERE SHE WORKS. IT'S
KIND OF AN OUT OF THE WAY STORE AND FEW PEOPLE COME THERE BEFORE
2PM. I ... |
5 |
113 |
17 |
0.86 |
7/23/2010 4:23 am |
|
|
Married
Do you know about the two TV antennas that got married?
The wedding was terrible, but the reception was ... |
0 |
35 |
5 |
1.84 |
7/22/2010 5:09 am |
|
|
The Institution Of Marriage
A couple is lying in bed, on their 20th wedding anniversary.
The woman suddenly feels her husband touching her in ways
that he hadn't done in years. He started at her neck,
and slowly traced a line ... |
0 |
61 |
4 |
1.69 |
7/21/2010 5:26 am |
|
|
Four
Two friends are playing golf one day at their local golf
course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when
he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the
course.
He ... |
0 |
46 |
3 |
1.47 |
7/21/2010 4:55 am |
|
|
Mr. Kensington Confesses
Have you ever masturbated to the point of levitation? I
do it all the time Ladies and Gentlemen, Virgins and Adult
FriendFinder Sluts, Twinkies and Ho's..Introducing:
"My Talking Cock" Blog 1 Series ... |
3 |
34 |
5 |
1.51 |
7/18/2010 7:10 pm |
|
|
Bambi The Blonde
When the surgeon came to see Bambi on the day after her operation,
she asked him somewhat hesitantly just how long it would
be before she could resume her sex life.
"Uh, I hadn't really ... |
0 |
65 |
7 |
1.77 |
7/18/2010 6:12 am |
|
|
A Line At The Bar
A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next
to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance,
then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this ... |
1 |
68 |
9 |
2.14 |
7/18/2010 6:02 am |
|
|
The Gynecologist
One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband gently
taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm.
The wife turns over and says, "I'm sorry honey,
I've got a gynecologist ... |
0 |
65 |
5 |
2.49 |
7/17/2010 5:58 am |
|
|
Swallowing Sperm
A young mother was once again pregnant and trying to explain
to her little girl just how she had gotten that way. She explained
how a baby was growing in her tummy, and how it took and egg
and a ... |
0 |
68 |
5 |
3.14 |
7/17/2010 5:46 am |
|
|
If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
This is a true story. I swear.
A couple years ago I went with my son and a few of his buddies
to a sports bar not too far from my home. It was a huge place
with a whole big room of video ... |
1 |
83 |
2 |
4.50 |
7/16/2010 8:56 pm |
|
|
The Blond Wife
After hearing a couple's complaints that their intimate
life wasn't what it used to be, the sex counselor suggested
that they vary their positions.
"For example, " he suggested, "you might ... |
0 |
63 |
3 |
2.45 |
7/16/2010 4:18 pm |
|
|
A Smart Old Man
An elderly couple had been dating for some time and decided
it was finally time to marry. Before the wedding they embarked
on a long conversation regarding how their marriage might
work. They ... |
0 |
42 |
2 |
1.04 |
7/16/2010 4:13 pm |
|
|
... a joke from a TV program
The other day, I walked into the flat and found my girlfriend
having sex with an old friend I knew ages ago ....
But do you know what the worst thing was?
... ... |
0 |
35 |
1 |
3.70 |
7/15/2010 8:56 am |
|
|
Grandma Still Drives!
Grandma is eighty-eight years old and still drives
her own car.
She writes,
Dear Grand-daughter,
The other day I went up to our local Christian book store
and saw a ... |
7 |
64 |
19 |
3.65 |
7/14/2010 1:37 pm |
|
|
waiting..
Waiting anxiously for his return, she waits patiently
by the phone Hoping that sooner or later he'd call to let her know
he's home Once she finds out he's there. she runs to call him and hear what he ... |
0 |
29 |
1 |
5.00 |
7/14/2010 10:17 am |
|
|
Top 10 things men know about women.
10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2. They have breasts.
1. They ... |
1 |
24 |
3 |
2.45 |
7/11/2010 6:17 pm |
|
|
6 mins late
>6 Minutes Late > >There was a man named George who got a new job. His >fellow employees always met for a round of golf every
>Saturday. They asked George to meet them at 10:00 >Saturday morning. ... |
0 |
40 |
2 |
4.50 |
7/11/2010 4:05 pm |
|
|
Trainees..
Upon marriage, the wife of a rich tycoon confessed to her
husband, "Darling sorry i lied to you all this time,
i'm not a virgin." The husband turns and says,
"That's great coz i'm a very busy man ...
|
1 |
62 |
2 |
3.81 |
7/9/2010 1:13 am |
|
|
Amazing
Is this all you need to do to get free ... |
2 |
43 |
1 |
0.00 |
7/4/2010 2:46 am |
|
|
sex talk
Have u ever had a a female demand u to choke them? well one
time when i was with this female in bed and she spread her
legs open for me to slide my dick open. so i got on top started
getting it i ... |
3 |
75 |
8 |
0.47 |
6/28/2010 12:41 am |
|
|
love
LIFE & TIME r d gr8 teachers .......... LIFE teaches
u d use of TIME and TIME teaches u d value of ... |
2 |
25 |
3 |
0.49 |
6/25/2010 8:54 am |
|
|
ITS TRUE
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole ... |
2 |
57 |
4 |
0.00 |
6/23/2010 1:59 am |
|
|
This One's Mickey Mouse
Mickey Mouse is having a nasty divorce with Minnie Mouse.
Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. "I'm
sorry Mickey, but I can't legally separate you two
on the grounds that Minnie is ... |
10 |
145 |
32 |
3.80 |
6/14/2010 5:15 am |
|
|
Good Advice
"Relationships are hard. It's like a full-time
job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or
girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two
weeks' notice. There should be ... |
6 |
66 |
18 |
2.44 |
6/14/2010 4:12 am |
|
|
Some Women Like Policemen
A man bought a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving
him and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was
left of his ... |
4 |
120 |
19 |
3.65 |
6/10/2010 11:51 am |
|
|
Because Women Are Tough
Three men were sitting in a bar talking about how whipped
they had their wives.
The first two kept bragging about how they could get their
wives to do anything.
They looked at the ... |
2 |
104 |
6 |
3.65 |
6/10/2010 11:26 am |
|
|
Three Men And Two Women
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband walking
around with a fly swatter.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"Hunting flies, " He responded.
"Oh, killing any?" ... |
2 |
102 |
6 |
3.37 |
6/9/2010 6:52 am |
|
|
A Milk Bath
A blond heard that milk baths would make her beautiful.
She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.
When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake.
He ... |
2 |
94 |
5 |
3.14 |
6/9/2010 5:35 am |
|
|
Women Vs Men
What do they call a woman who works as hard as a man?
Answer: ... |
2 |
81 |
5 |
2.16 |
6/8/2010 2:00 pm |
|
|
Multiple Orgasms
A woman went to a doctor and said , doctor, I have a problem.
every time I sneeze I have an orgasm. the doctor said, oh
really, what have you been doing for it. the woman replied,
snorting ... |
4 |
102 |
9 |
2.78 |
6/8/2010 6:18 am |
|
|
She Screamed
A woman went to her doctor's office. She was seen by
one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination
room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall.
An older ... |
2 |
119 |
15 |
3.44 |
6/7/2010 8:43 am |
|
|
A Woman's Prayer
I pray for:
Wisdom, To understand a man. Love, To forgive him and; Patience, For his moods. Because if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to ... |
6 |
55 |
24 |
0.00 |
6/7/2010 8:37 am |
|
|
Seriously....
When chatting online, nothing makes me want to close the
chat window faster than a guy saying "ask me anything
you want". Yeah, I know that's my perogative.
If we can't even make conversation ... |
2 |
121 |
6 |
1.09 |
6/3/2010 12:32 pm |
|
|
forget
  ?*happym;{=}>>!happyf;  ...\8 |
5 |
28 |
11 |
1.11 |
5/30/2010 1:26 pm |
|
|
lorenz
building my self up as who i am ... |
1 |
13 |
1 |
2.40 |
5/29/2010 5:37 am |
|
|
There's got to be a morning after !
In the shitty gaa-bie little small southern town of
Purgatory I live in I was found hanged from a pine tree limb
in the overgrown front yard of the abandoned house I was
hiding away from the world ... |
21 |
168 |
87 |
1.35 |
5/28/2010 7:22 am |
|
|
E.R. stories
After being married to an RN for 25 years, I got divorced
and a bit later, started dating an RN who worked in a large
suburban emergency room. It was in an affluent suburb,
so they didn't get a lot ... |
2 |
149 |
14 |
2.82 |
5/19/2010 7:19 am |
|
|
Glad I am married
I am a married 33 year old woman. I have a divorced sister
who is 31. After listening to her about the current guy she
is seeing it makes me even happier that I have found my soul
mate. My sister ... |
4 |
149 |
25 |
1.14 |
5/17/2010 4:39 am |
|
|
The Bagpiper and the Homeless Man!
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked
by a funeral director to play at a grave side service for
a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service
was to be at a pauper's ... |
5 |
82 |
22 |
1.08 |
5/10/2010 10:48 am |
|
|
MILF DAY
MOTHER I LIKE to...
ridiXXXulous COMMON CENT$:
A special day for all women out there whom have either pooped
out a child(ren) or have assumed the duties/position of
a "mother". ... |
0 |
177 |
3 |
0.98 |
5/9/2010 6:18 pm |
|
|
First Date Fuck Ups
We've all had them. Admit it. Everybody's had
at least one. Well, I've had more than one. There's
one that almost got me arrested. And how about the one who's
wife called me ten minutes after he ... |
1 |
166 |
10 |
4.18 |
5/9/2010 10:59 am |
|
|
A Perfect Ten
Little da and Jenny are only 10 years old, but they just know
that they are in love.
One day they decide that they want to get married, so da goes
to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand. ... |
2 |
61 |
13 |
2.30 |
5/8/2010 8:45 am |
|
|
The Lady Is A Tramp
A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman
makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.
Joan ... |
0 |
47 |
4 |
0.92 |
5/8/2010 8:26 am |
|
|
Some Males Duck
Babysat a roomful of 6 year olds, my heart beating louder
than a pack of screaming hyenas, walked out with them quiet
and safe in their parents arms,
Improvised a speech I never wrote to an ... |
2 |
56 |
15 |
0.00 |
4/30/2010 7:38 am |
|
|
WILL YOU BURY ME?
I WILL ALWAYS FIND PEOPLE WHOM THREATEN SUICIDE TO RECLAIM
A RELATIONSHIP AMUSING.
ridiXXXulous COMMON CENT$:
YEA...DEATH...HOW ROMANTIC.
SUICIDE...WHAT AN ... |
4 |
35 |
10 |
1.19 |
4/18/2010 7:48 pm |
|
|
humor
if a hot guy grabs you on the ass and pussy your so lucky, if
a not so hot guy grabs you on the ass and pussy it's sexual
abuse and he gets charged.how are men supposed to know if
it is right to ... |
1 |
40 |
2 |
1.04 |
4/17/2010 11:32 am |
|
|
Free kittens !
A pretty little girl named Suzy was standing on the sidewalk
in front of her home. Next to her was a basket containing
a number tiny creatures; in her hand was a sign announcing
FREE KITTENS. ... |
3 |
120 |
38 |
1.25 |
4/17/2010 7:25 am |
|
|
The Blindfold BJ Follies
This story begins on a very routine endeavor. At this time,
I donated plasma. It's merely for financial gain or
more specifically to keep food in my cupboard and gas in
my car until a job was found ... |
2 |
108 |
3 |
2.94 |
4/5/2010 9:43 pm |
|
|
yellow thread
this lady i used to live with when i was younger that the only
way she would let me live with her was if i promised to stay
a virgin. And if she ever found out if i had sex she would than
sew my hole ... |
7 |
158 |
32 |
0.14 |
3/24/2010 9:40 pm |
|
|
Mixed emotions !
A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program
about psychology and explaining the phenomenon of mixed
emotions.
The husband turned to his wife and said, Honey, thats
a ... |
5 |
147 |
56 |
0.00 |
3/16/2010 10:13 am |
|
|
Happy Birthday to You !
Happy Birthday !
Here's a toast to you, you, nasty, freaky, gutta minded, sexy
mutha fucka! I hope today marks the beginning of a new fucking
chapter in your fucking career. May you get a ... |
6 |
67 |
12 |
0.00 |
3/9/2010 8:34 pm |
|
|
Sweet tea !
A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue.
Doctor: "What happened?"
Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every
time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a ... |
7 |
196 |
70 |
0.41 |
3/1/2010 8:16 am |
|
|
Store dressing room lol
One of my old boyfriends and I had gone to the states for a
little vacation and he decided we were going to go to Target
to get me some bras.
We picked out a pile of them and headed to the ... |
11 |
361 |
36 |
1.51 |
2/25/2010 6:31 pm |
|
|
Church Offering !
One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering,
the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing
$1, 000. It happened again the next week!
The following Sunday, he ... |
5 |
166 |
42 |
0.00 |
2/25/2010 1:21 pm |
hrrs, 56 M
2/16/2010 8:11 pm
167
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
When My Parents Visit
Being that it was my birthday, I have to admit I was hoping
for breakfast in bed. When I wandered into the kitchen,
half-asleep and even less coherent, I was hoping for at
least a decent breakfast. I ... |
7 |
370 |
14 |
4.26 |
2/16/2010 8:11 pm |
|
|
Cucumber, Melon, and Jessica Biel's Cousin (part 3 of 3)
So, remember when Anna Biel (the lookalike to Jessica)
said she wouldn't fuck Cass and Thorn?
Mmmmm, tea-roasted crow, baked crow, crow-pot-pie, or
just plain fried crow, which do you think ... |
2 |
61 |
4 |
4.41 |
2/12/2010 4:58 pm |
|
|
"Idunno what you two are up to, but I aint fuckin ya" (Jessica Biel part 2 of 3)
Sometimes, live bait just lies there.
Fishing with worms is a tricky thing. Get em too wet, and
they drown. Leave em in the sun, get em too hot, and they just
shrivel up. Forget to keep the ... |
1 |
25 |
3 |
2.94 |
2/11/2010 9:11 am |
|
|
Cass is the reel... (Jessica Biel's Cousin part 1 of 3)
..and I'm the rod. Together, we haul em in by the BOATLOAD.
I heart Jessica Biel like whoa. I mean, I don't have
any posters of her up or anything (yet) but I really dig that
chick. I think ... |
1 |
38 |
2 |
4.50 |
2/10/2010 3:02 pm |
|
|
sexx
A boy open his pants and ask a girl do u want this? Girl remove her skirt and panties and replied: My mom said: you have this and you will get plenty of ... |
4 |
137 |
10 |
0.80 |
2/2/2010 5:04 am |
|
|
WHO SAYS I WANT TO KISS YOU EVEN?
OK I'm running a little bit hot tonight. Can't
see the road from the heat coming on. Reach down between
my legs and ease the seat back.
One more before I call it a night.  ... |
20 |
137 |
47 |
0.83 |
1/27/2010 9:23 pm |
|
|
STAGES OF BEING DRUNK
Stage 1 SMART This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject
in the known Universe. You know everything and want to pass on your knowledge to
anyone who will listen. At this stage you ... |
3 |
79 |
9 |
3.64 |
1/17/2010 6:50 am |
DDBDM, 46 C
1/14/2010 10:24 pm
3
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Compliments come in many forms
Being sexy for the one you love is as important and feeling
sexy. As we age and grow old with our partner we still want
to look good. When I was young I was a swimsuit model, now
that I'm middle ... |
13 |
153 |
37 |
2.22 |
1/14/2010 10:24 pm |
|
|
Leela Kee Maa Kee
.
If you have seen a reindeer or a bull you know what being horny
means. It sticks out a mile away. As I have said earlier too, I am 24x7 horny and on a blind date
it didnt take me long to get down ... |
13 |
280 |
15 |
1.91 |
1/8/2010 6:33 am |
|
|
HAVE YOU EVER FUCKED SOMEONE THAT HAS A BAD SMELL????
Its a funny yet serious situation because its hard to tell
someone they smell...... ... |
13 |
120 |
19 |
1.28 |
1/5/2010 10:43 am |
|
|
Just an Accident
My mom said I was accident prone and may be she is right. We
were on our honeymoon in a hill resort, and the world was
my oyster. The room had a beautiful hill side view, and opened
on to a terrace ... |
3 |
283 |
14 |
3.30 |
12/27/2009 3:34 am |
|
|
Ever notice?
How when you're looking for something - you can never
find it. Then when you're not, it finds you. Only when
it does, it's like a bizarro version of whatever you
were originally looking ... |
3 |
40 |
1 |
2.40 |
12/24/2009 5:42 am |
|
|
Why does money cause so many problems.
It's so funny. I work a 7 day week, nearly 60 - 70 hours
per week. But when I want to spend $100 on myself. oh my god,
all hell breaks loose. Sure honey, you can buy that top,
those pants, oh can get ... |
4 |
67 |
3 |
2.94 |
12/23/2009 1:52 am |
|
|
Superman, Super mistake
Superman decides to go out on the town one evening
- flies over to the bat cave and asks Batman out for a beer.
Batman replies: "Sorry, I can't come out tonight
- the bat mobile is ... |
6 |
123 |
14 |
3.46 |
12/17/2009 2:37 am |
|
|
The Blowjob Revenge
A woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinks.
While they're sitting there having a good time together
she starts talking about this really great new drink.
The more she talks ... |
2 |
149 |
9 |
3.43 |
12/17/2009 2:29 am |
|
|
finding that girl
I rarely find a girl that makes me laugh does ... |
1 |
51 |
1 |
0.00 |
12/10/2009 4:40 pm |
|
|
Roger's night out
Roger is a hard worker, and he spends most of his nights
bowling or playing volleyball. One weekend, his wife decides
that he needs to relax a little and take a break from sports,
so she takes ... |
1 |
103 |
6 |
3.08 |
12/10/2009 2:04 am |
|
|
Horsing around
This man was sitting quietly reading his paper one
morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife sneaks
up behind him and whacks him on the back of his head with a
huge frying pan. ... |
1 |
101 |
3 |
2.45 |
12/10/2009 1:41 am |
|
|
The Prick
While away at a convention, an executive happened
to meet a young woman who was pretty and intelligent. When
he persuaded her to disrobe in his hotel room, he found out
she had a superb body as ... |
1 |
99 |
4 |
2.86 |
12/10/2009 1:39 am |
|
|
Somethings never change
Roger lived by himself on a remote stretch of beach.
One day as he was riding his horse along the shore he saw a
beautiful woman painting a canvas. He rode up and down in
front of her, but she ... |
1 |
83 |
2 |
3.12 |
12/10/2009 1:32 am |
|
|
Your Momma
So a 19yr old boy was walking dow the hall towards his room
and heard his Mom and Dad making strange noises in thier
room. He opened the door to find his dad in just some chaps
on top of his Mom in a ... |
13 |
318 |
31 |
3.62 |
12/5/2009 8:43 pm |
|
|
Serious Couples Have To Have Relationship Humor.
When attemping the swinging lifestyle one thing you wanna
make sure you have is relationship humor.I think with out
this it's hard for a couple to live in this lifestyle.
I wanna know what you others ... |
2 |
87 |
5 |
3.14 |
12/5/2009 6:04 pm |
|
|
john and jill
John and Jill were about to go into his apartment and before
he could open his door, Jill said, "Wait a minute,
I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door."
John says, "Well, ... |
6 |
232 |
19 |
4.84 |
11/21/2009 3:33 pm |
|
|
a day in the life....
A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the
doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this
prognosis, the man asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she
agrees, and they make ... |
1 |
149 |
5 |
3.80 |
11/21/2009 11:10 am |
|
|
A woman without a man
An English professor wrote the words, "A woman
without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and
told the students to punctuate it correctly.
The men wrote: "A woman, without her man, ... |
1 |
162 |
13 |
4.65 |
11/21/2009 12:10 am |
|
|
the wedding
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the
service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can
a man marry?"
"Sixteen, " the boy responded.
His cousin was amazed that he ... |
1 |
148 |
8 |
2.78 |
11/20/2009 12:35 pm |
|
|
rewards in heaven
3 Men were waiting to go to heaven. St Peter was at the gate
and said, "However good you were to your wife that
is the vehicle you will get in heaven".
The first guy comes up to the gate and ... |
1 |
130 |
3 |
4.90 |
11/17/2009 2:26 am |
|
|
why buy the cow....
The only cow in a small town in Arkansas stopped giving milk.
The people did some research and found they could buy a cow
in North Carolina, for $200.00.
They bought the cow from N. C. and ... |
1 |
131 |
8 |
3.71 |
11/15/2009 8:50 am |
|
|
shoulda bought a hat.....
An elderly couple named Margaret and Burt live in Alberta.
Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. So
seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home,
walking proudly. He ... |
1 |
121 |
7 |
3.30 |
11/12/2009 12:48 am |
|
|
good trade....
Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in
Northern Arizona, when she saw an elderly Navajo woman
walking on the side of the road. As the trip was a long and
quiet one, she stopped the ... |
1 |
122 |
9 |
4.49 |
11/10/2009 8:59 pm |
|
|
marketing and promotions
One of the airlines recently introduced a special half-fare
rate for wives accompanying their husbands on business
trips.
Anticipating some valuable testimonials, the publicity
department of ... |
2 |
102 |
5 |
2.49 |
11/10/2009 8:14 pm |
|
|
air traffic controller
While taxiing at London's Gatwick Airport, the crew
of a U.S. Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a
wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. An irate
female ground controller ... |
1 |
115 |
6 |
4.50 |
11/10/2009 8:12 pm |
|
|
Blondes are smart too & yes some lawyers are windbags
This came from a friend of mine;
A lawyer on a trip via asked the blonde head stewardess if
she could put the crabs he had in a secure place for the two
hour flight. He made sure he had ... |
1 |
133 |
3 |
4.41 |
11/10/2009 11:22 am |
|
|
Marital vows
Jack and his fiancée Jill were a modern couple, quite
realistic about the state of marriage these days.
They met with the minister of the church to discuss their
marriage vows. ... |
1 |
107 |
7 |
3.04 |
11/10/2009 1:45 am |
|
|
an italian,a frenchman ,and the jew
The Italian man says, "Last week, my wife and I had
great sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil, we made
passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes
at the end."
The ... |
2 |
100 |
4 |
3.25 |
11/9/2009 10:11 pm |
|
|
big boobs
i have come to realise that most young men who see me are intrested
in my breast and my grosse butt while old men are intrested
in what you can make them happy with why this may be you can
tell ... |
7 |
138 |
38 |
0.66 |
11/9/2009 12:21 pm |
|
|
Golf can make you mean
A man was driving recklessly down the interstate
one day and his girlfriend in the passenger seat was getting
very upset.
The man finally realized that she was not happy with his ... |
1 |
85 |
5 |
3.47 |
11/9/2009 1:24 am |
|
|
Impressing your date
To impress his date, the young man took her to a very
chic Italian restaurant. After sipping some fine wine,
he picked up the menu and studied it with an appraising eye.
"We'll have ... |
1 |
81 |
3 |
2.94 |
11/9/2009 1:23 am |
|
|
This is nice
let me know what you think about ... |
6 |
82 |
4 |
0.53 |
11/8/2009 10:16 pm |
|
|
guess your weight
A man decides he wants to have a pig roast, so he goes out to
a pig farm to buy one. He agrees on a per pound price with the
farmer and then begins to select a pig. "How about
that one?"
... |
1 |
83 |
2 |
3.81 |
11/7/2009 7:19 pm |
|
|
goat hunting
A city boy was visiting the country and wanted to go hunting.
The farmer lent the boy his gun, telling him not to kill any
farm animals.
The city boy headed off and soon after saw a goat. He ... |
1 |
84 |
3 |
3.92 |
11/7/2009 7:08 pm |
|
|
used parrot
Rhonda went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large
beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said
$50.00. "Why so little?" she asked the pet store
owner.
The owner replied, ... |
1 |
78 |
3 |
3.92 |
11/7/2009 6:50 pm |
|
|
freudian slips
Two guys are discussing their weekends around the watercooler
one Monday, and one says, "You ever have an embarassing
slip of the tongue? I was at dinner with my girlfriend, and
the waitress had a ... |
1 |
109 |
12 |
2.80 |
11/4/2009 5:48 am |
|
|
The act of listening to your wife
A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some
friends when the subject of marriage counselling came
up.
"Oh, well we never need that. My wife and I have a great
relationship, " ... |
2 |
91 |
6 |
4.22 |
11/4/2009 12:31 am |
|
|
Wife or Mistress ?
A man wanted to determine if both his wife and mistress
were faithful to him. So he decided to send them on the same
cruise, then later question each one on the other's
behaviour.
When ... |
2 |
101 |
11 |
2.61 |
11/4/2009 12:29 am |
|
|
A husband's gift
A married couple was in a terrible accident where
the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told
the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from
her body because she was too skinny. ... |
2 |
81 |
6 |
4.22 |
11/4/2009 12:26 am |
|
|
Wife's permission to play Golf
There were three friends that always wanted to play
golf every Saturday afternoon, but couldn't because
of their wives objections.
So one day after many years they finally got together ... |
2 |
63 |
5 |
2.16 |
11/4/2009 12:24 am |
|
|
secret to a long marriage
There once was a little old man and woman who had been married
happily for 75 years. They never kept anything from each
other. But, the little old woman had a box in her closet which
she told her ... |
3 |
99 |
6 |
3.37 |
11/3/2009 11:22 pm |
|
|
2 hours of GREAT SEX !!!!
Did you hear about the fellow that was talking to his buddy,
when he said, "I don't know what to get my wife
for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she
can afford to buy anything she ... |
0 |
68 |
1 |
3.70 |
11/2/2009 10:24 pm |
|
|
story with a moral....
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch
of a neighbouring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur's
youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as ... |
1 |
60 |
6 |
2.51 |
11/1/2009 8:36 pm |
|
|
the virtue of purity
A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, come in on
a fairly regular basis. After the second week, he made his
move. "No thank you." she said politely. "This
may sound rather odd in this day ... |
1 |
65 |
8 |
2.78 |
11/1/2009 6:05 pm |
|
|
one of THOSE days....
A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar getting soused.
A man comes in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you
sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?"
Farmer: Some things you just can't ... |
1 |
62 |
6 |
2.51 |
11/1/2009 5:52 pm |
|
|
six double vodka's
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the bartender, "Give
me six double vodkas." The barman says "Wow! you must have had one hell of
a day."
"Yes, I've just found out my older brother ... |
1 |
63 |
6 |
2.23 |
11/1/2009 5:49 pm |
|
|
Any luck anybody
Ok i havent had any luck on this website yet. Maybe cos i aint
gold or silver. But one thing for sure.. IF i get lucky here
i am going to turn out a full time writer. ( jsut so that i can
get points ... |
2 |
47 |
4 |
2.47 |
10/31/2009 3:56 pm |
|
|
a sexist joke :O
...why do men like to be on the bottom during sex so much?
......because they only know how to fuck up ... |
2 |
44 |
8 |
2.09 |
10/30/2009 6:17 am |
|
|
Who enjoys sex more ? A man or a woman ?
A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into
an argument about who enjoyed sex more.
The man said, "Men obviously enjoy sex more than women.
Why do you think we're so obsessed ... |
5 |
137 |
18 |
3.26 |
10/12/2009 5:16 am |
|
|
The healing touch !
A Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one
afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The
man looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that
Jesus sitting over there?" The ... |
15 |
201 |
75 |
0.00 |
10/2/2009 4:40 pm |
|
|
Evolution of humans
A little girl asked her mother, "How did the
human race come about?"
The Mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve; they
had children and, so all mankind was made."
A few days ... |
2 |
114 |
14 |
3.14 |
10/1/2009 5:45 am |
|
|
Little Johnny & Grandma's words
Little Johnny was attending his first day
of school.
The teacher advised the class to start the day with the pledge
of allegiance, and instructed them to put their right hands ... |
2 |
115 |
10 |
1.99 |
9/30/2009 2:43 am |
|
|
Laziness
The man told his doctor that he wasn't
able to do all the things around the house that he used to
do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now,
Doc, I can take it. Tell me in ... |
3 |
105 |
14 |
3.46 |
9/28/2009 9:51 pm |
|
|
Alcoholic husband
A pissed-off wife was complaining about
her husband spending all his free time in a bar, so one night
he took her along with him. "What'll you have?"
he asked.
"Oh, I don't ... |
2 |
122 |
7 |
1.51 |
9/28/2009 9:31 pm |
|
|
The Mistress
A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine
restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman
comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss,
tells him she'll see him ... |
1 |
121 |
9 |
2.14 |
9/26/2009 1:13 am |
|
|
GENDER ITEMS
ZIPLOC BAGS - male, because they hold everything in, but
you can always see right through them.
SWISS ARMY KNIFE - male, because even though it appears
useful for a wide variety of work, it ... |
1 |
57 |
6 |
1.09 |
9/25/2009 9:10 pm |
|
|
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN! do u agree?
A Woman's Vocabulary, Keywords and Meanings (as taken
from an interview with a woman)
FINE This is the word we use at the end of any argument in which
we feel we are right, but need to shut ... |
2 |
44 |
5 |
0.86 |
9/25/2009 8:56 pm |
|
|
What a Woman Wants in a Man
What I Want In A Man, Original List ... (at age 22) ----------------------------------- 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3. Financially Successful 4. A Caring Listener 5. Witty 6. In Good Shape 7. Dresses ... |
1 |
37 |
5 |
1.19 |
9/25/2009 8:51 pm |
|
|
Politically Correct
He does not have a BEER GUT. He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN
STORAGE FACILITY.
He is not a BAD DANCER. He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME. He INVESTIGATES ... |
1 |
40 |
3 |
1.47 |
9/25/2009 10:08 am |
|
|
Combacks
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine? ... |
1 |
47 |
4 |
2.86 |
9/25/2009 10:07 am |
|
|
Men
... Blenders. You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
... Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm, ... |
1 |
26 |
5 |
2.16 |
9/25/2009 10:06 am |
|
|
You can't change a Man
A woman went to a lawyer to discuss divorcing her
husband. "Don't you love him anymore?"
asked the lawyer.
"Oh, I still love him, " the chick replied.
"But all he ever wants is sex, I ... |
1 |
78 |
5 |
3.14 |
9/25/2009 6:10 am |
|
|
The secret of a long married life
A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised
a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren.
When asked the secret for staying together all that time,
the wife ... |
1 |
83 |
4 |
3.63 |
9/25/2009 6:06 am |
|
|
20 Years in prison
A woman wakes up during the night to find that her
husband was not in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs
to look for him.
She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a ... |
1 |
94 |
2 |
1.73 |
9/25/2009 1:41 am |
|
|
Little Johnny and his questions
Little Johnny asked his father, 'Daddy,
how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still
paying.'
Little Johnny asked, 'Is it true ... |
2 |
83 |
5 |
4.12 |
9/25/2009 1:39 am |
|
|
AMISH ELEVATOR
An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed
by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny,
silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together
again. The boy ... |
0 |
73 |
2 |
5.20 |
9/18/2009 2:36 pm |
|
|
Goodbye Daddy
tsk tsk tsk...motherhood is a certainty...fatherhood
a probability...
GOODBYE DADDY
A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and ... |
0 |
116 |
1 |
2.40 |
9/18/2009 2:24 pm |
|
|
Marriage counselingâ !
A husband and wife came for counseling after 20 years
of marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went
into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem
they had ever had in the ... |
11 |
209 |
43 |
0.00 |
9/4/2009 5:38 pm |
|
|
30 truths about women
1. Wherever they are, women will stop to look at four things,
earrings, handbags, shoes, and clothes.
2. Women love eating chocolate cake but always complain
about their weight.
... |
6 |
123 |
15 |
1.60 |
9/1/2009 2:54 am |
|
|
Trip to Vegas !
George and Gertrude decided to celebrate their 50th
Wedding Anniversary with a trip to Las Vegas. When they
entered the hotel/casino and registered, a sweet young
woman dressed in a very short ... |
11 |
169 |
35 |
0.00 |
8/25/2009 3:09 pm |
|
|
A little Gassy
Had a buddy who lived in the next room in a house with me in
college. The house was old so the walls were thin and we could
always hear when he was going at it with someone. so, one
night, I knew ... |
3 |
136 |
13 |
1.97 |
8/14/2009 10:11 am |
|
|
Tjek
Now i see you all never had done it untill with your own free
will seek for hypnoses like i am a gini in a bottle just give
me ... |
4 |
48 |
5 |
0.21 |
8/10/2009 1:45 pm |
|
|
GENDER ITEMS
ZIPLOC BAGS - male, because they hold everything in, but
you can always see right through them.
SWISS ARMY KNIFE - male, because even though it appears
useful for a wide variety of work, it ... |
1 |
46 |
3 |
1.96 |
8/8/2009 5:16 am |
|
|
WHAT WOMEN SHOULD KNOW ABOUT MEN
1. If you think the way to a man's heart is through his
stomach you're aiming to high.
2. Women don't make fools of men-most of them are the
do-it-yourself types.
3. The ... |
3 |
71 |
3 |
1.96 |
8/6/2009 5:08 am |
|
|
Funny Scenario
list ... |
2 |
53 |
1 |
3.70 |
8/4/2009 7:39 pm |
|
|
Safe sex on this website...
Condom or ... |
2 |
50 |
3 |
1.47 |
8/4/2009 7:12 pm |
|
|
Confounded sex !
A man was in a terrible accident, and his 'manhood'
was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him
that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance
wouldn't ... |
13 |
168 |
44 |
0.71 |
8/3/2009 4:43 pm |
|
|
Man Rules
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and
after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what
time I want-and I don't expect ... |
3 |
105 |
5 |
4.45 |
7/27/2009 9:29 pm |
|
|
Milk
For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you
can get the milk for free."
Here's an update for you . . . Nowadays 80% of women are
against marriage.
Why?
Because ... |
6 |
125 |
17 |
3.27 |
7/25/2009 8:03 am |
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Comebacks to Pickup Lines
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine? ... |
3 |
68 |
5 |
2.16 |
7/24/2009 5:23 pm |
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|
The Cuckoo Clock
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told my husband that I would
be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the
hours passed and the champagne was going down way too easy. ... |
1 |
101 |
6 |
3.37 |
7/23/2009 4:39 pm |
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|
BAD NEWS
A secretary walked into her boss's office & said,
"I'm afraid I've got some bad news for you."
"Why do you always have to give me bad news?"
he complained.
"Tell me some good news ... |
3 |
185 |
12 |
3.15 |
7/5/2009 4:23 am |
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|
And the moral of the story is...
A few friends and I was eating in the food court at the mall
(perimeter for those that live in GA). The food court sits
on a hall that has an "L" curve, where we can see
who's walking towards us, ... |
3 |
92 |
5 |
2.49 |
7/2/2009 7:24 am |
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|
The Justice League: Sex Chronicles!
Superman is flying over a building one day and sees Wonder
Woman sunbathing naked on the rooftop, legs spread wide
open. Well, he's horny so he decides to fly down ultra-fast
so she won't see him and ... |
9 |
134 |
21 |
2.75 |
6/25/2009 12:11 am |
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|
what if
Everybody wonders "what if" once in a while.
Just hit reply and fill it out about the person that posted
this. Don't forget to be honest!
What if...
1. I died:
2. ... |
7 |
56 |
17 |
0.30 |
6/23/2009 6:55 am |
|
|
read
u be crazy if u like ... |
1 |
34 |
1 |
2.40 |
6/18/2009 2:35 am |
|
|
joys of single life
Cooking my own meals would be an adventure, not a punishment.
I wouldn't have to explain why I'm wearing "that"
shirt with "those" pants.
I could leave the toilet seat in any ... |
1 |
33 |
1 |
3.70 |
6/17/2009 12:31 am |
|
|
perfect couple
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After
a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their
life together was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy
Christmas Eve, this ... |
2 |
107 |
4 |
4.80 |
6/16/2009 11:51 pm |
|
|
Messing With Sasquatch
Yeah I was stealing cigarettes from a bisexual all night.
That's what she gets for stealing my women right. And
she only caught me once. Took the damn smoke out of my mouth
for herself. So I ... |
5 |
137 |
12 |
2.09 |
6/15/2009 2:15 pm |
|
|
Girlfriend Blowjob Revenge
I once had a girlfriend that was mad at me, and rather than
just yell at me she decided to play it cool for a couple hours.
After a couple hours had gone by she had this great idea to
give me a blow ... |
10 |
316 |
25 |
4.46 |
6/10/2009 12:05 pm |
|
|
The one lost golf ball
I have been with my Master for four months now and he is great.
I love to please him. One night after he got off work he called
me and said he wanted me to try and get four golf balls in my
pussy, he ... |
5 |
183 |
15 |
3.74 |
6/6/2009 7:22 pm |
|
|
Suck My Tainted Nuts... How Dealing With Diarrhea Can Save The Economy
I wonder how many dollars we throw away each year on Salmonella
scares. You know, when one guy pukes after sucking on some
tainted nuts. I mean, I would puke too if I had to suck some
guys nuts ... |
8 |
60 |
6 |
2.80 |
6/4/2009 8:10 pm |
|
|
Marital Bliss ! ?
While driving to his mothers house a husband and wife
got into it as usual because he was going to see his mom.
The husband told his wife, "BITCH! Don't say
a fucking word when we get ... |
9 |
177 |
24 |
0.00 |
6/2/2009 1:40 pm |
|
|
Two elderly women !
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades.
Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities
and adventures.
Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a
few ... |
9 |
165 |
31 |
0.46 |
5/25/2009 5:01 pm |
|
|
Shrink vs.Bartender
Psychiatrists vs. Bartenders
EVER SINCE I WAS A CHILD, I'VE ALWAYS HAD A FEAR OF SOMEONE
UNDER MY BED AT NIGHT. SO I WENT TO A SHRINK AND TOLD HIM 'I've got problems. Every time I go to bed ... |
5 |
124 |
6 |
5.36 |
5/24/2009 12:58 pm |
|
|
slave and master
there are many girls and many boys who prefer the slave/master
situation. i think that it is not so good. since it will make
us lose the taste of the sex intercouse and became like machines.
love is ... |
5 |
54 |
4 |
1.30 |
5/21/2009 9:35 am |
|
|
how to make your woman happy....
How to Make a Woman Happy
It's not difficult to make a woman happy.... A man only needs to be:
1. a ... |
4 |
83 |
6 |
4.79 |
5/19/2009 10:46 pm |
|
|
Sex, Lies, and Video Games
Do you have a man that loves to play video games? Well, I have a story for you..........
Coming from my 9 to 5 job. Waiting on tables for impatient
customers. My feet a sore and my back is ... |
5 |
138 |
9 |
4.28 |
5/18/2009 3:23 pm |
|
|
Men and Women
Men and Women on planet earth die from various places throughout
the world at a particular moment in time and go to God's
abode to be judged.
The God welcomes this ... |
2 |
63 |
3 |
4.90 |
5/9/2009 8:21 am |
|
|
On Picking up Men
Many years ago, my Mother sat my twin sister and I down in
order to explain the Facts Of Life to us.
However, she told us that this was not as nearly as important
as where one should meet ... |
0 |
170 |
5 |
2.16 |
5/8/2009 8:26 pm |
|
|
orgy
big orgy...lights off...after half an hour a guy is screaming!!
turn on the lights!!! I got fucked 20 times and I am trying
to fuck the ... |
2 |
202 |
11 |
0.55 |
4/30/2009 7:16 am |
|
|
fart
two married flies were eating on a piece of shit...the male
gives a fart..and the other says...hey baby we are eating ... |
2 |
90 |
9 |
0.86 |
4/30/2009 7:04 am |
|
|
gang bang
The father is black, the mother white, but the boy looks
like china boy...and ask his father why? and he replies...stop
asking you bullshit! it was a gang bang!...and you are lucky
that you are not ... |
3 |
171 |
13 |
0.96 |
4/30/2009 7:00 am |
|
|
Fliration of Youth
I had posted some photos on one of those generic sites.
The photos were the type relatives usually take....me
eating or adjusting my panties, for an example.
Somehow these photos ... |
3 |
141 |
6 |
4.22 |
4/26/2009 4:35 am |
|
|
The thrill is gone !
The thrill is gone from my marriage", a man tells
his friend.
"Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an
affair?" the friend suggested.
"What if my wife finds out?' the ... |
17 |
207 |
47 |
1.68 |
4/22/2009 2:40 pm |
|
|
funny marrige
a husban and wife have been married 20 years.the husban
used a dildo on her the full 20 years.wife finds out and says, alright
do you wont to explain the dildo jerkoff ., he turns to her
and says., ... |
2 |
129 |
6 |
2.23 |
4/22/2009 4:48 am |
|
|
For people that remember Bob hope !
May 29, 1903 - July 27, 2003
ON TURNING 70 "You still chase women, but only
downhill".
ON TURNING 80 "That's the time of your life even
when even your ... |
7 |
110 |
45 |
0.90 |
4/20/2009 1:21 pm |
|
|
IT'S ONLY DICK "BEWARE"
Relationships can be a blast. But what happens when you
hear, Oh baby let's do a girl it will be so HOT! So, If
your the type of woman like me. Get your man some pussy! It's
only pussy. So, you get a ... |
6 |
219 |
17 |
3.83 |
4/18/2009 2:31 pm |
pscoby, 53 M
4/18/2009 1:54 pm
2
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
A man is trying to fly a kite in his back yard...
It keeps crashing to the ground because it has no tail on
it.
His wife comes out of the house and watches for a moment,
then says "Honey, you need a little tail."
Without looking ... |
1 |
94 |
4 |
4.41 |
4/18/2009 1:54 pm |
pscoby, 53 M
4/18/2009 1:47 pm
2
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
A woman walks into the marrage counseler's office...
"Doctor, my husband is getting a little queer to sleep
with." she blurted out.
"Why do you say this?" The Doctor asked, "Does
he make you perform unnatural sex acts?"
"No." the ... |
2 |
133 |
4 |
4.80 |
4/18/2009 1:47 pm |
|
|
Present For Husband
A woman goes to Italy to attend a 2-week, company training
session.
Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have
a good trip.
The wife answers : "Thank you honey, ... |
3 |
162 |
9 |
2.14 |
4/16/2009 7:09 am |
|
|
How to Make a BBC Slut!
I frequently receive requests from a hubby/boyfriend
as to how to turn their wives into BBC sluts and always my
answer has been, if you as the hubby/boyfriend can not convince
her, how then can I as ... |
3 |
238 |
7 |
2.53 |
4/12/2009 11:41 am |
|
|
What would YOU do?
A man returns home a day early from a business trip. It's
after midnight. While enroute home he asks the cabby if
he would be a witness. The man suspects his wife is having
an affair and he wants ... |
3 |
131 |
23 |
2.19 |
4/12/2009 10:39 am |
|
|
For men only ! ! !
5 RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW TO A HAPPY LIFE
1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home,
who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.
2. ... |
13 |
210 |
111 |
0.07 |
4/7/2009 10:25 am |
|
|
10 COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE
Commandment 1
Marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.
***********
Commandment 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay ... |
3 |
113 |
14 |
0.26 |
4/7/2009 3:32 am |
|
|
A Doctor speaking in front of an audience !
The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have
killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful.
Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining.
Chinese food is loaded with ... |
19 |
184 |
155 |
0.88 |
4/3/2009 11:21 am |
|
|
Vertically Challenged
The testicles of a Texas midget hurt and ached almost all
the time.
The midget went to the doctor and told him about his problem..
The doctor told him to drop his pants and he would ... |
3 |
155 |
8 |
5.56 |
3/25/2009 9:50 pm |
|
|
bono interrupted my loving
I was with my girl for 2 weeks that time, and i visited her
for 3 days, we only got out of bed to get to the toilette. We
kept having our fun for 15 times in about one day. She loves to listen to ... |
1 |
95 |
3 |
2.45 |
3/20/2009 12:22 pm |
|
|
Computer Trouble !
I was having trouble with my computer. So, I called Richard,
the 11 year old next door whose bedroom looks like Mission
Control, and asked him to come over.
Richard clicked a couple of ... |
25 |
372 |
217 |
0.71 |
3/16/2009 11:51 am |
|
|
lips
Why does a woman have two sets of lips? One set to bitch with
and the other set to apologize ... |
2 |
67 |
9 |
2.78 |
3/16/2009 12:12 am |
|
|
funniest thing during sex
curious to know what the craziest/funniest thing people
have had happen to them during ... |
6 |
151 |
7 |
1.51 |
3/15/2009 2:43 pm |
|
|
did your dick ever been injury while having sex
When you guys 've fucking so hard during having sex
by a woman on top of you, moving her ass up down, up down, up down, fast and hard
..harder ...harder , your hands grabbed her ass hard and harder ... |
0 |
69 |
2 |
3.12 |
2/23/2009 6:49 pm |
|
|
louisiana bride
Three men chose brides.
The first man married a woman from OHIO . He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took
a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home ... |
2 |
123 |
7 |
1.77 |
2/23/2009 9:52 am |
|
|
Training opportunities for men
Winter Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTRE
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Friday 27th February 2009
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, ... |
3 |
60 |
12 |
2.09 |
2/21/2009 8:55 pm |
|
|
10 quirky facts about kissing
Think you know a thing or two about kissing? You probably
do. But the facts below are so off the beaten path, well
bet you dont know them alland they could come in handy.
Not only could they ... |
9 |
234 |
30 |
0.00 |
2/20/2009 7:38 pm |
|
|
Why is my Twin Sister so dense????
I had just mentioned to my twin sister that I would be appearing
at a local comedy club down in South Jersey, just a short
drive from her home in Delaware.
She asked me "What will you be ... |
0 |
162 |
5 |
1.84 |
2/19/2009 7:39 pm |
|
|
SEX AND YOUR FIRST NAME
According to studies, your sexual identity is revealed
by the first letter of your first name what do you think? Those of you with names that start with N will probably wish it started with K ... |
6 |
300 |
15 |
3.74 |
2/4/2009 3:01 pm |
2U4U2, 50 F
1/30/2009 8:46 pm
7
Articles,
Score
0.0
|
|
Here" a good one folks............
I kind of am seeing this guy; ya, kinda of seeing this guy.
We been together for about 3 1/2 years and it really hasnt
gone anywhere but until I get out of the relationship, which
is like next ... |
3 |
198 |
16 |
0.00 |
1/30/2009 8:46 pm |
|
|
What's wrong with this picture?
My twin sister is the stupidest smart person I know. Her
college G.P.A. was 3.98.
I never tell anyone my grade point average because it would
prove that there is "an inverse relationship ... |
5 |
182 |
8 |
2.55 |
1/28/2009 2:29 pm |
|
|
Love Me In The Morning
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said,
"Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?"
She said. "No. I hate myself now." (Rodney ... |
6 |
135 |
26 |
2.06 |
1/21/2009 5:45 pm |
|
|
A + class act
we started chating in an NZ Friend Finder chatroom. The conversation was going well and the young man wanted
to continue on IM Yahoo Messenger.
He told me that his name was Philip S, I can't reveal
his ... |
9 |
293 |
28 |
2.01 |
1/20/2009 1:22 pm |
|
|
looking for couples to swing in delhi
hi i am male 35 from delhi(INDIA), willing to travel(whole
world) with mature female or couple's, but i need genuine
person who also want to enjoy. No paid one, so please any one is intrsted please ... |
1 |
46 |
7 |
1.51 |
12/24/2008 4:21 am |
|
|
a slip of the tongue
A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh
and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the
guy next to him has a black eye, too.
He says to him, "Hey, this is a ... |
2 |
208 |
15 |
1.60 |
12/24/2008 3:40 am |
|
|
always get a second opinion...
A doctor and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you
are no good in bed either, " and storms out of the house.
After sometime he realizes he ... |
2 |
188 |
7 |
2.53 |
12/24/2008 3:32 am |
|
|
40th anniversary
On their 40th wedding anniversary and during the banquet
celebrating it, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief
account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration.
"Tell us Tom, ... |
3 |
124 |
7 |
2.02 |
12/24/2008 3:29 am |
|
|
memory class
An elderly couple had been experiencing declining memories,
so they decided to take a power memory class where one is
taught to remember things by association.
A few days after the class, ... |
1 |
84 |
4 |
1.69 |
12/24/2008 3:27 am |
|
|
Bottle of Wine
For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were
married, or wish you weren't married, this is something
to smile about the next time you open a bottle of wine:
Bottle of Wine ... |
0 |
177 |
10 |
4.18 |
12/19/2008 12:36 pm |
|
|
The Orange popsicle
I met this very cute blonde at a club oine night and after
a few drinks suggested that we go some where else (code for
lets hook up). We got as far as my car and after a few hot kisses , she ... |
2 |
303 |
8 |
1.39 |
12/18/2008 9:46 pm |
|
|
4 sons
A husband and wife had four boys. The odd part of it was that
the older three had red hair, light skin, and were tall,
while the youngest son had black hair, dark eyes, and was
short.
The ... |
2 |
189 |
2 |
0.00 |
12/9/2008 12:45 pm |
|
|
the phone call
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.
When a cell phone on a bench rings, a man engages the hands-free
speaker function and begins to talk....
MAN: "Hello"
... |
4 |
147 |
4 |
0.14 |
12/9/2008 11:55 am |
|
|
100 camels
As US tourists in Israel, Morris and his wife were sitting
outside a Bethlehem souvenir shop, waiting for fellow
tourists.
An Arab salesman approached them carrying belts.
After an ... |
0 |
73 |
0 |
0.00 |
12/9/2008 11:47 am |
|
|
gone fishin'
Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge.
One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across
the bridge.
He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head.
... |
0 |
102 |
6 |
3.65 |
12/6/2008 6:27 am |
|
|
hey
whats goin on in the world today its ... |
1 |
26 |
4 |
0.14 |
12/4/2008 12:06 pm |
|
|
home late
Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one
turns to the other and says,
"You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever
I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the ... |
0 |
100 |
2 |
1.73 |
12/4/2008 12:28 am |
|
|
every saturday morning....
Every Saturday morning he has an early tee time. He gets
up early and eager, golfs all day long, sometimes 36 holes.
Well, one Saturday morning he gets up early, dresses quietly,
gets his ... |
0 |
86 |
2 |
2.42 |
12/2/2008 10:27 pm |
|
|
LOL....at the end of his rope.........
One day a young cowboy and cowgirl decided to get married.
He was a man of the world. She was an innocent bride with no
experience.
After the wedding they left for their honeymoon. While ... |
0 |
87 |
4 |
3.63 |
12/2/2008 9:55 pm |
|
|
LOL(this was cute)
One night a guy takes his girlfriend home.
They are about to kiss each other goodnight, but the guy
is feeling a little horny.
With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand ... |
0 |
96 |
2 |
1.04 |
12/2/2008 8:10 pm |
|
|
the birthday present
A young man wished to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart's
birthday, and as they had not been dating very long, after
careful consideration he decided a pair of gloves would
strike the right note ... |
0 |
52 |
2 |
1.04 |
12/2/2008 7:55 pm |
|
|
newlyweds
A young couple left the church and arrived at the hotel where
they were spending the first night of their honeymoon.
They opened the champagne and began undressing.
When the bridegroom ... |
1 |
88 |
6 |
1.66 |
12/2/2008 7:50 pm |
|
|
applying for social security
A retired gentleman went to the social security office
to apply for Social Security.
The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver's
license to verify his age. He looked in his ... |
2 |
97 |
8 |
3.94 |
11/28/2008 2:32 pm |
|
|
the newlyweds
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and
after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what
time I want-and I don't expect ... |
0 |
68 |
9 |
2.78 |
11/28/2008 2:30 pm |
|
|
a better ofer
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the
pastor with an unusual offer:
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change
the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm
supposed ... |
0 |
68 |
3 |
1.96 |
11/28/2008 2:27 pm |
|
|
anniversaries////
0in 6 seconds to 200
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary.
His wife was really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a
gift in the ... |
0 |
69 |
1 |
5.00 |
11/28/2008 11:31 am |
|
|
Humour
How far do you go in a relationship humor? How far does it
take your partner to get pissed off? Im just wondering.
Everyones different So ... |
0 |
22 |
0 |
0.00 |
11/26/2008 10:40 am |
|
|
ROFLMAO !
Two old people, a man and a woman, walk into a hospital.
The doctor says to the old man, "I'll need a urine
sample, a feces sample, and a blood sample."
The old man says, "What?" So the ... |
11 |
197 |
131 |
0.46 |
11/21/2008 8:16 am |
|
|
Men are from Mars
Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named
Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have
a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner,
and again they ... |
7 |
146 |
16 |
3.72 |
11/18/2008 3:39 am |
|
|
Free advise to Men from women
Might clear up some misconceptions, then again might not.
When watching TV hugging is always fine because I can still
see the screen. Kissing should only be done during timeouts
and commercials. ... |
4 |
90 |
14 |
2.50 |
11/18/2008 3:32 am |
|
|
met a girl
met a girl was up for fun then ran off with 56 ... |
5 |
101 |
30 |
0.59 |
11/14/2008 5:44 am |
|
|
multi personality
This was in high school. I went out with this girl. She was
like in the top five of pretty girls in school. She was pretty
popular, but the only thing was she had a multi personality
disorder. When I ... |
3 |
74 |
6 |
1.66 |
11/10/2008 11:19 pm |
|
|
Trick or treat
TRUE STORY. It happened in Cincinnati one evening while
the wife was giving out candy for Halloween. She asked her
husband to take over for awhile while she went to the bathroom.
She proceeded to ... |
0 |
189 |
4 |
4.02 |
10/27/2008 3:56 pm |
|
|
why boys only should have fun
anything is based on giving n taking and so is sex. there
should not b any question of great share in ... |
1 |
43 |
6 |
0.23 |
10/26/2008 9:58 pm |
|
|
let me tell it out
On their first night to be together, the newlywed couple
go to get changed. The new bride comes out of the bathroom,
all showered and wearing her beautiful robe. The proud
husband says, "My dear, we ... |
0 |
108 |
6 |
2.51 |
10/24/2008 8:43 am |
|
|
How to Seduce a Woman
How to make a woman laugh and seduce her
Things Youll Need:
* A willingness to learn * Some common sense * Yo learn from your mistakes and adapt
Step1 The best way to ... |
0 |
64 |
3 |
0.49 |
10/20/2008 8:43 am |
